In the corner of a big city lived a girl named Lata. Born in a poor family didn’t give her any opportunity that is given to girls of her age. She didn’t go to school and got married at the age of 16. Also, she was a pretty woman and was fond of keeping herself presentable at all times. She loved buying cosmetics, new clothes, footwear, earrings and what not! But her pocket didn’t allow so.
Her marriage started on a sad note, with being abused and beaten every night and soon she was carrying a baby in her belly. A year passed and there was another child. Her husband was out on weekdays and came home only on weekends because of his work. Her in-laws never supported her for anything and whenever their son was home, they filled his ears with lies and foul statements about her.
But she never really bothered to explain anything because she knew it in her heart nothing’s going to change and she kind of learned to live with it.
Soon there was a financial crisis in the family and she had to look for work in order to meet the ends. Soon she landed with a cook’s job!
Every day, she would get up on time and finish her house chores and leave for work, all decked up from top to bottom. No one could ever say that she was the house staff. She looked more like the owner of the house. Neatly draped saree with a fashionable deep neck blouse, a big bindi, bangles, chain, and fancy accessories were a few mandatory things without which she wouldn’t leave the house.
As she was earning, their financial condition improved! She started spending money wisely. Her expenses were distributed in such a way that she could meet the daily needs along with giving her children quality food, clothes, and other necessary items.
During this while, she fell for a man. She would take leave from work or leave a little early to meet him and while at work, she would spend afternoons on phone talking to that guy.
A few people in her neighborhood saw her with that man and labeled her as a characterless woman. Ladies prohibited their teenage daughters from being seen anywhere around her.
Yes, there was a fear in her mind... what if the husband finds out? He would kill her!
But she didn’t feel guilty about any of it!
No one valued her in the house; husband didn’t have time for her, and no one ever appreciated how drastically she improved everything in the house! She worked day and night but no one was bothered about her.
In the midst of this, when she met a man who had all his attention to her, who had time for her, who had fallen for her and who would do anything to make her happy, she couldn’t resist and started her affair with him. She knew it was wrong and... temporary, but all she cared for was a few moments of love and being loved in her life!
I am not vouching for an affair but tell me where was she wrong? Yes, having an affair outside marriage is condemned big time, but who doesn’t want to be loved? She couldn’t quit her marriage! Her father was ill; her brothers would never take her back. Where would she go? And in between all of this, her children’s life would be spoilt.
She wouldn’t risk their lives! And so she chose to have an extra-marital affair and risk her life instead!
Tell me your thoughts, right here, right now!
Cheers
Everyone wants love and attention. The family and husband are losers here.
ReplyDeleteThey sure are!
DeleteCheers
kind of a 'Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna' situation. Before, I may have tried to be moralistic on this. Now I am going to say 'she ahs every right to choose to be happy in her life'. If the husband and the family wants her in their life, they need to make the effort too.
ReplyDeleteGodyears.net
Yah! Kind of! I too believe in this, choosing one's happiness over everything else in the world! And if the husband is not getting this, it is absolutely his loss!
DeleteCheers
Its a tough one because generally I say you should leave the unhappy marriage first, but it doesn't sound like women have that option here. In those circumstances, I would tell her to go for it. It sounds like her one chance of actually having something in her life that isn't being forced on her and making her miserable
ReplyDeleteDebbie
But it's really tough to leave everything behind, I feel! Especially, when the kids are involved! All in all, one does what they have to do!
DeleteCheers
I would still say walk out of the marriage. She earns enough to take care of herself. Why does she need anyone to take her back? And if she is brave enough to love outside marriage, she is brave enough to walk out too. �� Extra marital is a complicated relationship which will anyway ruin her and her kids life.
ReplyDeleteYeah... she is making money, but leaving marriage, especially when you don't have anyone by your side is a tough call! That's the reason, not many choose this path! I totally second with your thoughts though, Raj!
DeleteCheers
Everyone seeks love and attention and deserves it too, but blessed are those who get what they truly deserve.
ReplyDeleteThough seeking live from an extra-marital affair appears to be right but in the light of sense, she should have stepped out of the marriage and then moved on with the man who loved her. That would not be the easy option, but would be the right thing for her own lasting happiness and also of everyone else. Especially her children. Besides she is financially independent, so she is capable of leading a life on her own terms.
Yeah! They are seriously the blessed ones! Easier said than done. I hope she garners the courage one day and calls off her marriage!
DeleteCheers
I think it's so sad that women are still being treated like this - marriage should be a haven and somewhere you feel loved and safe. An affair just complicates things and although it seems great at the time, ultimately it will cause more pain for everyone.
ReplyDeleteLeanne | cresting the hill
If at all everyone comes to know about it :P ;)
DeleteCheers
It is not about whether its the man or the woman who is having an affair, to me a commitment like marriage needs to be valued if you have made it monogamous.
ReplyDeletethough to each their own, only the wearer knows where the shoe pinches.
Very true, Pooja! Things like these hurt the most!
DeleteCheers
Leave the husband! Why does she need to go back to her fathers house, when she is financially independent?
ReplyDeleteI can never justify an extra marital affair, no matter what.
Mayuri
Courage... something that she was lacking!
DeleteCheers
When you put it like that, I can't say she was wrong. Everyone needs love and attention in their lives. It would be good to leave behind the family where she isn't respected instead of fearing her husband and living in pain!
ReplyDeleteExams
Exactly, never having experience love and then suddenly something of this kind strikes... sure she couldn't control herself!
DeleteCheers
I have no moralistic stand on this. I think she has every right to be loved and be happy. But I would still say she ought to walk out of this marriage. An extra marital affair can give her only a few hours of happiness, combined with all the stress and guilt and fear of getting caught. If she walks out of this marriage, and can marry the other guy, she has a higher chance of having a complete life.
ReplyDeletePlus, I think we ought to set the right examples for our kids. By staying in this unhappy marriage where people don't appreciate her, she is teaching her kids to compromise, to sacrifice their happiness for others. She is teaching them that it's okay to let others walk all over you.
Happy AtoZing!
Chicky @ www.mysteriouskaddu.com
Hi-fi to you Chicky! Very rare do people think like this!
DeleteCheers
It is a sad story but What if the man she fell for is also not worth leaving everything? How can she be sure of everything about him? She found love as she didnt get any with her husband but is it worth leaving her kids and her family life? That can be a tricky one.
ReplyDeleteI know! That ways, no one can be trusted. Right now, she's falling for the man but once the loves fades away, who knows whats gonna happen tomorrow!
DeleteCheers
Lata is financially independent woman, she should break social barriers and get separated for good. Momentary happiness may not lead her for contentment.
ReplyDelete@MeenalSonal AuraOfThoughts
I guess so! If only, she does!
DeleteCheers
We all seek that emotional connect in a relationship. now whether you get it within the marriage or outside you cannot be denied it.
ReplyDeleteI totally get that!
DeleteCheers
I don't think she is wrong, at all. She too has a right to be happy, find the happiness that is lacking in her life. She is fulfilling all her wifely and motherly duties, and if she yearns to fulfil her wishes, then she has full right to do so! Society has no business labelling her characterless, immoral. How many people from the society are moral, anyway?
ReplyDeleteI cannot agree more, Shilpa! We live in a world, where fairly everything is done and is acceptable at the same time!
DeleteCheers
Good for her. That son of a gun of her husband doesn't deserve a woman like her. Looking for love outside a loveless marriage is not a crime....
ReplyDeleteLoved to hear this :)
DeleteCheers
I know that she was not wrong, for how long can one hold his/her human desires. I am the first person who condemns extra marital affairs but what is one expected to do in such a situation buddy....thought-provoking post!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Roma! I'm glad you were able to think differently here :)
DeleteCheers
I would not like to judge anyone but I do think she should leave the marriage.
ReplyDeleteMay be one day she will!
DeleteCheers
I can understand she was not wrong, but there is this institution called marriage, I think she should leave it and then move ahead. To me, any situation needs to be dealt with rules, even if they are directly related to your emotions.
ReplyDeleteLaunching SIM Organics This April
*Menaka Bharathi *
*SimpleIndianMom*
Who knows, one day she might just leave everything and walk away!
DeleteCheers
Five years ago I held very different views on the subject. I think I was bound by rigid rules of someone else's morality. But soon I learnt that morality is something that we define, for ourselves. It's a loosely defined concept, and if we were to live a life to not judge anyone, then rules can always be bent.
ReplyDeleteIn her case, I can't find anything wrong with what she did. Like you said "Who doesn't want to be loved." I just wish she has the strength to walk out of her situation though. So that she doesn't have to live in fear.
Me too! So much has changed with time and I too have left the rigidness in me way behind! We need to accept things the way they are!
DeleteCheers
Everyone wants to have that feeling of being alive, loved and wanted in a relationship. If you dont get it in your marriage, you seek it outside. But you need to weigh the pros and cons of it. For the road of EMA is not easy. It may rock your boat at home and what happens when monotony sets in your EMA? Tricky thing it is!!
ReplyDeleteYeah! Going for an EMA too requires lot of courage and much more risk!
DeleteThat's why it gets so tricky !
Cheers
Every human being, he or she have the right to be happy. If someone wants the other to be there in their life, they should make an effort for the same. And do hope she had the strength to walk out that marriage.
ReplyDeleteStrength and courage, if only one has !
DeleteCheers
Everyone deserves some love and care. I strongly believe, every human have appetite for different thing and you have various relationships for various appetites. single relation can't do all. Just like Vidya Suri talked about it in her blog of Cozy Slippers
ReplyDeleteMy take on E is in form of story too.. On the trail of silver mist
Ooo.. I've not seen that. I'm sure gonna find that out!
DeleteCheers
Every human deserves love, care and affection. And just like Vidya Suri said in her blog Cozy Slippers We need different people for different appetite of human needs
ReplyDeleteMy take on E is in form of story too.. On the trail of silver mist
Yeah! Everyone have different needs in their lives!
DeleteCheers
All she needed was a little love & appreciation. It would not be wrong if she gets it outside the family. From my point of view, I would say that the family were losing a very talented & loving person. They should have been giving her what she got from this other man.
ReplyDeleteIf the family could understand this, nothing like it!
DeleteCheers
I can understand her perspective coz there are children involved in this situation. Sometimes no matter how wrong it is morally, one has to consider the happiness of people around them. If the children are too young to stay away from either their father or mother and if the mother gets a temporary relief from her pains, she deserves it. Walking out is a healthy option but it needs to be considered without affecting the children in the long run.
ReplyDeleteVery true, Vinodini! When children are involved it's not that easy to walk out of the marriage!
DeleteCheers
There's nothing wrong in falling in love with the right person, but I feel instead of two timing her hubby, she can opt out of the marriage. Though it might have repercussions, honesty is any day better, no?
ReplyDeleteShubhangi @ The Little Princess
Yeah. Being honest is important in relationships but here she wasn't having one with her husband!
DeleteCheers
She should take her kids and walk out. Then she should enjoy the rest of her life with the person she loves. This way she will live in fear even if she justifies it with reasons. :)
ReplyDeleteHaha! Sounds like a plan!
DeleteCheers
Great post! Nothing wrong with falling in love. I wish, she could just walk out of her abusive relationship. I wish for that courage in most women.
ReplyDeleteCourage is the biggest thing here which not everyone has, Parul!
DeleteCheers
Walk! Do not look back!
ReplyDeleteHopefully!
DeleteCheers
Divorce, isn't a very convenient thing specially in small communities!
ReplyDeleteI hope one day she would, though!
Cheers
She should just get out of the marriage. End of story,
ReplyDeleteYeah! I too feel the same!
DeleteCheers