Once there lived a girl who belonged to a poor family. Her life was a struggle with no comfort at all. One day she fell in love with a boy, who unlike her came from a rich background. They got married one day and were soon blessed with a baby girl.
The baby girl turned out to be a bully in her teen years. Because of puberty, she had put on a lot of weight and she always wore clothes that revealed every curve of her body. Tight jeans and tight top became the talk of the town at every stop! Plus, she lived in a conservative family which meant no freedom of her own!
While the school grades kept going down, the number of blank calls on their landline rose like never before. Rumors about her roaming on the streets with boys and doing offensive things in public were the only topic that was discussed amongst everyone. She disobeyed and disrespected everyone who questioned her way of living and yet her parents supported her and accepted the fact that she wants to live her life and no one should interfere. This was when she was only 14!
She was the apple of their eyes and they fulfilled her every single demand. Never did they once tell her the importance of good values, respect for elders and modesty, because they didn’t want their daughter to go through anything that was remotely difficult. And yet her teenage years were difficult!
After completing her education, she found a nice guy for herself and got married to him. Her parents didn’t really like the guy and found him to be one hooligan but couldn’t say much about their daughter’s choice.
Soon the love fever was over and life became a daily war for the couple! Both of them hit and abuse each other and treated one another worse than animals. Sometimes, the girl tried to mend things. And in the lure of making things right, she forcefully had a baby, hoping it would make things right one day, just the way elders say in our society. But things didn’t change. Rather, her husband grew even more violent because he never wanted to have a baby!
After spending 9 futile years on her marriage, she’s finally getting a divorce!
And the baby shall live with the mother.
Source |
Whose fault was it? The mother who thought she would give her daughter everything.. a life that she never got and thus never scolded her for anything. Was she wrong in thinking this? Or the father who saw in the early years that his daughter wasn’t walking on the right track, and yet left everything on time! Or the family, in spite of being aware of her actions uttered a word, neither to her nor to her parents?!
The freedom to let her live the way she felt like did a lot more damage than repairing it!
Tell me what you think? Were the parents right? Was the mother right in thinking of giving every possible happiness to her daughter? I know a little bit of strictness is important but how do you justify the totally unreasonable behavior of your child? Growing years are the foundation of one’s character. What was done, do you think it was right in the eyes of the mother who supported her daughter unabashedly?
What's your take on it?
What's your take on it?
Cheers
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I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Cheers
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Welcome to my Blog! I’m so happy to have you here! This A to Z Challenge, I’m going to give you a ride and take you to all the places untouched! My theme this year is ‘Let’s see the other Side’, where I’ll be sharing about the daily nuances that we’ve been seeing in the same way since 1990’s! (:P) But this time you’re going to ponder over it a bit differently.
I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Life is all about balance - ultimately you can't give someone just happiness because they become shallow and dependent and can't cope in crisis. They make bad decisions and don't know how to handle the consequences. We need to mix discipline with encouragement in the right amounts with our children.
ReplyDeleteLeanne | cresting the hill
That's how every one does! But as for the parents, they do what they feel is right and it can never be judged! Parents can never wish bad for their child!
DeleteThanks for dropping by, Leanne!
Cheers
Parenting requires the balance. IT is not justified to give complete freedom h=just because she didnt get it. As they say, everything in life is required just the right amount. Hence too much freedom, took over and she seldom learnt the ways of life and happiness
ReplyDeleteSadly, that is the truth and the reason is still unfathomable!
DeleteCheers
Impossible situation.I feel every parent has a choice.And once we are 18 we have a choice.What we choose makes life different.
ReplyDeleteYeah! But the foundation years are different! Everyone has a unique take on it!
DeleteCheers
Good grounding in children comes from example n not words. Homes where things are practiced and not preached are very kids turn out humble, grounded n independent.
ReplyDeleteBeing a parent is tough ad there is no manual!!! 😊
Flower power
Very true, Shalz! But there are still so many humble people, who practice it in their house and yet their children don't have an iota of humbleness in them!
DeleteCheers
It wasn't right buddy. Balance is the key as well as laying the right foundation for you kid to grow up into a strong and trustworthy individual. In this case, parents were totally responsible for the spoilt brat she became.
ReplyDeleteI guess! I'm still trying to find out the reasons where it went wrong!
DeleteCheers
Alas, there is no one way for raising kids. Yes, there should be some discipline during the growing up years, but then, we really can't be judgmental about this. Parents try to give their best, but their best might not be best for the child.
ReplyDeleteHappy AtoZing!
Chicky @ www.mysteriouskaddu.com
Exactly! One does what they feel is right! And in the lure of giving happiness, it turned out to be opposite!
DeleteCheers
There is no one right way to be a parent. You can't wholly blame them. The flipside being had they restricted her too much, it would've turned out a lot worse.
ReplyDeleteThis is a tough one to make a call on. No one is responsible, yet somehow everyone is.
I too have similar thoughts, Sreesha! If they would have restricted her, who knows, she would turn even more against her parents!
DeleteCheers
I cant say parents can be blamed here but girl is at fault as she didn't listen to her parents. This was a very extraordinary tale Geetika.
ReplyDeleteMaybe her parents didn't say much to her because she wouldn't like it!
DeleteThank you so much, Deepa! I'm glad you enjoyed reading it!
Cheers
The parents are at fault. Tough love is important and critical to inculcate good values and respect in children.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could say that! Yes, parents need to be strict and supportive at the same time! But too much of support can take a u-turn as well!
DeleteCheers
Freedom is important, but with responsibility. Unbridled freedom like this only destroys. Balance is everything!
ReplyDeleteYup. Balance is the key!
DeleteCheers
We can't really blame anyone...everyone has their share of mistakes and yet everyone has tried to make things right. Blame it on karma...
ReplyDeleteShubhangi @ The Little Princess
Yeah! That is again a good perspective to look at!
DeleteCheers
Values are what is important. We learn that in our growing up years. Freedom was okay but values were a miss I guess.
ReplyDeleteValues are the laying bricks of who become in the future!
DeleteWell said, Parul!
Cheers
Believe it or not we are all born with our destiny. There is no formula for parenting and nothing succeeds like success. A good person has a good mother but the bad person ? Parents get a bad name no matter what they do
ReplyDeleteThat's one angle I never looked at! But it is so very true! If she was destined to be divorced and no power or values in the world would be able to stop it from happening!
DeleteCheers
A situation in many households. Who's to blame? Difficult to pinpoint and say. A kid going haywire does not completely reflect on the parent's parenting style. It's also for the child to learn to appreciate and responsibily handle the freedom.
ReplyDeleteAfter all Rumi rightly said,
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass
the world is too full to talk about.
Yes it's about striking balance in all that we do in life without being judgemental.
Such beautiful lines! Thanks for sharing Natasha!
DeleteCheers
nice post. I agree with your point. I know a woman whose son was a complete urchin, an extremely offensive person with no respect for women but still, in the name of personal freedom she justified all his mistakes. Now, he has become completely unmanageable and she herself is scared of his erratic temperament. This topic is quite relevant.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Ankita! See, now this is what I was talking about!
DeleteCheers
I know! It isn't just about parents... there are lot of things that affect us and shape our personality!
ReplyDeleteCheers
Freedom is important but not to this extent. It is the parents' duty to inculcate good values in their children. If she was corrected at an early age, things wouldn't have been so bad
ReplyDeleteThe road of parenting is not an easy one. You cant give too much freedom and you cant enforce restrictions on your children too. A fine balance is what's needed and of course, the values and the ethics have to be inculcated from the very beginning.
ReplyDeleteCertainly the parents... That much freedom can mess with anyone's head.
ReplyDeleteFreedom with boundaries is important in parenting. Being too strict can lead kids to go astray as well.
ReplyDeleteThe parents can be blamed for only part of it. Many have had tough situations growing up and still were able to make good choices. If she was even half way educated, or had average common sense, she could of turned things around. It gets old, when younger generations blame their parents for their lot in life. To a point, sure but bottomline, we all have choices.
ReplyDeleteI think the parents should have stepped in when she became a bully, but as for the clothes and dating etc. I think the judgemental society around her should take some of the blame for how things turned out. Judging others says more about you than it does about them!
ReplyDeleteDebbie